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Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis., by Eric Berne
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We think we’re relating to other people–but actually we’re all playing games.
Forty years ago, Games People Play revolutionized our understanding of what really goes on during our most basic social interactions. More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne’s classic is as astonishing–and revealing–as it was on the day it was first published. This anniversary edition features a new introduction by Dr. James R. Allen, president of the International Transactional Analysis Association, and Kurt Vonnegut’s brilliant Life magazine review from 1965.
We play games all the time–sexual games, marital games, power games with our bosses, and competitive games with our friends. Detailing status contests like “Martini” (I know a better way), to lethal couples combat like “If It Weren’t For You” and “Uproar,” to flirtation favorites like “The Stocking Game” and “Let’s You and Him Fight,” Dr. Berne exposes the secret ploys and unconscious maneuvers that rule our intimate lives.
Explosive when it first appeared, Games People Play is now widely recognized as the most original and influential popular psychology book of our time. It’s as powerful and eye-opening as ever.
- Sales Rank: #12190 in Books
- Color: Multicolor
- Brand: Ballantine Books
- Published on: 1996-08-27
- Released on: 1996-08-27
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.20" h x .44" w x 5.43" l, .40 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 216 pages
Features
Review
“An important book . . . a brilliant, amusing, and clear catalogue of the psychological theatricals that human beings play over and over again.”
–KURT VONNEGUT, Life magazine
From the Inside Flap
"We think we're relating to other people-but actually we're all playing games.
Forty years ago, "Games People Play revolutionized our understanding of what "really goes on during our most basic social interactions. More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne's classic is as astonishing-and revealing-as it was on the day it was first published. This anniversary edition features a new introduction by Dr. James R. Allen, president of the International Transactional Analysis Association, and Kurt Vonnegut's brilliant "Life magazine review from 1965.
We play games all the time-sexual games, marital games, power games with our bosses, and competitive games with our friends. Detailing status contests like "Martini" (I know a better way), to lethal couples combat like "If It Weren't For You" and "Uproar," to flirtation favorites like "The Stocking Game" and "Let's You and Him Fight," Dr. Berne exposes the secret ploys and unconscious maneuvers that rule our intimate lives.
Explosive when it first appeared, "Games People Play is now widely recognized as the most original and influential popular psychology book of our time. It's as powerful and eye-opening as ever.
About the Author
D'abord medecin comme son pere, il se tourne vers la psychiatrie et exerce aux Etats-Unis. A partir de 1946 il est psychiatre dans differents hopitaux a San Francisco et ouvre son cabinet de psychanalyste a Carmel, Californie. En 1956, il demande sa reconnaissance comme psychanalyste et il n'est pas accepte. Ce refus sera pour lui un aiguillon pour formaliser sa propre maniere de travailler et ajouter quelque chose de nouveau a la psychanalyse. Ses travaux donneront naissance a l'Analyse transactionnelle.
Most helpful customer reviews
101 of 103 people found the following review helpful.
A Must-Have. Highly Readable.
By Pen Name Nick
I was initially a little skeptical of a book that was a bit old, thinking it would be outdated, but I found this to be extremely relevant. Upon buying the book, I initially jumped to the games section, skipping over the details of Berne's theories. I was immediately struck with how many games I was unconsciously playing in both my relationship with my spouse and in my work life. With my spouse, I found the games "If It Weren't For You" and "Look How Hard I've Tried" to be hauntingly similar to some of our interactions. I've recently been analyzing my transactions with colleagues at work and noticed patterns that fit many of the games described here as well.
Berne's section on the theory behind games is fascinating. I recommend reading about some of the games first and then moving to the theories. By understanding the theories, you learn WHY you inevitably participate in these games. After I understood why I was being drawn into these patterns, I was able to understand my motives. And ultimately, after understanding my motives, I was able alter my actions and responses when needed.
Overall, I found this book to be very useful in understanding my relationships with people. It is refreshingly different than a lot of the self-help material out there. This book cuts right to the chase and gives you tools to live by. I highly recommend it. After reading this book, I also read What Do You Say After You Say Hello by Eric Berne as well as Scripts People Live by Claude Steiner.
31 of 31 people found the following review helpful.
An Oldy, but a Goody!
By beowulf_ctb
This book is one of the Bibles of the Transactional Analysis school of social psychology/psychiatry. The other "Bible" is I'm OK -- You're OK by Thomas A. Harris, M.D.
Before reading Games People Play, it is a good idea to read I'm OK - You're OK. There are two reasons why. First, I'm OK is a general introduction to Transactional Analysis whereas Games People Play deals with a narrow aspect of the subject. Second, I'm OK is written in an easier style than the present book. In fact, if I hadn't already studied I'M OK, I might not have understood Games People Play.
The author of Games People Play was the founder of the TA school. The author of the other book was his follower. Transactional Analysis was popular during the 1960s and 1970s. Since then, it has lost some of that popularity in America, although it still seems to be going strong in Australia. The society founded by Dr. Berne still exists in this country, today.
Before investing in a copy of the book, you might want to check Wikipedia which has an excellent article about Tranactional Analysis. Games, the subject of this book, are special behaviors that people use to accomplish ulterior designs. For example, the game called "If it Weren't for You I'd...." helps people feel better about NOT doing things they are really afraid to do.
I believe this book and the school of Transactional Analysis are worthwhile for everyone who wants to understand human nature.
30 of 30 people found the following review helpful.
Knowing when you are manipulated by others will lighten your life burdens!
By Peggy A. Griffin
I remember buying this book when it hit the market, and now I'm buying it for others in my family to read. I'm sixty now so I've had plenty of time to see lots of games and manipulation, some of which I got pretty good at myself. No blame or shame involved. Most families pass down their learned ways of coping to the next generation so this stuff has always been going on. As I age I am very much less interested in other's games or even my own. Victims, tears, blame, "you caused my problems" I just leave to their owners. Life is too full of fun to be manipulated or guilt-tripped by anyone, and I do believe in total responsibility for my life and what happens in it. Read this and forgive yourself for your games and unplug from other's attempts to control you by any means they can. This book is one of my favorites! Recommended reading for those in the pangs of guilt from anyone, even parents or children.
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